Social anxiety triggered by specific words or topics

I've been dealing with anxiety for quite some time now. When certain words or topics come up in social situations, I get really nervous and start shaking, my heart beats faster, stuff like tht. It happens because of what I think people might infer if they see me reacting.

Some triggers are about things I do but there's nothing wrong with them, and I don't want othesr to know. Other times, it's about things I haven't done but worry others would think I have. And sometimes it's just stuff that dooesn't apply to me but was mae out to be bad when I was growing up.

For instance, being gay isn't something I am, but back then it was seen as a big deal. So even hearing the word "gay" or talking about related topics freaks me out because I'm worried people might think that way about me and get suspicious.

I also worry if I try explaining this to someone, they'd draw conclusions based on my reactions. Like with the gay example, maybe they'd assume I'm homophobic or for other triggers, think I've done something bad just because of how I react when certain things come up.

I have autiism and social anxiety too, which probably makes it worse. Has anyone else had similar problems? What can I do to stop ths from happening?

For now, I try avoiding situations where those trigger words or topics might come up. If we're watching a film with others, I pick one without the triggers but don't say why.

Does anyone have any advice on dealing with this better?