I Think Something Might Be Wrong With Me

I've been feeling really empty adn numb lately, which feels strange to admit because I also experience happiness, sadness, and anger. But when I'm alone in bed,especially at night, it's like everything inside me shuts down or gets replaced with upsetting thoughts. It makes sense that something is off with how I feel, but I can't pinpoint what exactly.

I did some research on borderline personality disorder and mentioned my concerns to my therapist. He said I might not fit the diagnosis since it's usually for adults, and I'm not one of them. I don't know if he's right or if there's another reason I shouldn't consider that option. I really struggle with going to therapy sessions because I feel so uncomfortable sharing what's on my mind.

I useed to self-harm before, but recently it happened again. My parents don't know about this, and I'm scared they might get too worried if they find out. There's more stuff going on, but I don't want to go into details here. I just feel lost and unsure of what to do next, so any suggestions would be really helpful. Thanks for listening.