Feeling super alone right nowhonestly, it's been a rough day

Hey everyone, just gonna spill the tea here cause honestly,I've hit that point where I feel like there's no escape from this lonely tunnel I'm stuck in. So yeah, 36-year-old dad with a wife and kids heer, but let me tell you, it's tough trying to find guy buddies when all my true connections are with women. Growing up was cool-I was always more into hanging with the girls-and everything seemed chill until puberty hit. That's when things got really weird, and I just ended up being suepr isolated.

Nowadays, every time I connect with someone awesome, i'ts like "Sorry bro, you should totally meet my husband instead!" Or they set me up with some guy who bores me to tears on a blnid date, while all I want is to catch up over coffee or drinks. So, I end up having zero buddies because no one seems to get that platonic friendship stuff isn't weird-except apparently it's not socially okay for someone like me to have female friends.

And my wife? Well, she's great but doesn't really understand what I'm going through emotionally. She's always saying "I'm sorry you're having a hard time" and pushing me towards gusy as friends. It feels like society is telling me that because I'm not into girls in the way they expect me to be, platonic relationships with them aren't a thing. So here we are-me trying to have real connections, but everyone just nods and says "yeah, good luck with that," while suggesting more dates with dudes who leave me cold.

Back in my 20s, girls would get mad if I tried to be just friends without dating them. And now? No one wants to hang out because they think something's up or assume there's some hidden agenda on my part. So yeah, looks like it might be an endless solo journey for me here